The destination for everyone is the same...DEATH but everyone's journey is different. Some people reach their destination sooner, some reach later, some people enjoy their journeys but some suffer throughout their journeys, some people have exciting journeys and some may have boring journeys, but eventually everyone will reach the same destination. Why am I writing all this? Well, there is a death in my extended family. My MIL's brother had just passed away on Tuesday in hospital after suffering from a stroke a week ago, fell into a coma and being pronounced brain-dead. They decided to take off his life support system and let him go yesterday afternoon. He was only 64 years old and just retired from work a year ago, leaving behind his wife, a daughter, son-in-law and a son. No grandchild yet.
We went to the wake last night and his wife came over, greeted us and fell into my arms for comfort. We were never this close to be hugging like that! But I think she needed all the comfort she could get from everyone, so I hugged her, sharing her sorrows and my eyes swelled up. Her eyes were swelling up too but my MIL told her not to be so sad, let him go with a peace of mind so that he will have a smooth journey into the ether world. I have heard of advises like these in every wake I have attended and I always think to myself, how can one not be sad and cry when one's dearest pass away? The wake is just 3 to 7 days when all friends and relatives will be coming over to give their condolences. They will sit around, chit-chat, eat, drink and some even play mahjong until late in the night. The family of the deceased as hosts will need to attend to their friends and relatives, participate in prayers and rituals led by the priests throughout the duration of the wake. They are usually being kept busy and probably won't have much time and energy to dwell on the fact that their dearest have passed away and cry over it. However, after all these activities are over and when all their friends and relatives have gone home, what will become of them? Won't the loss be suddenly so obvious and the sadness be even more overwhelming?
Every time I attend a funeral or hear of someone's passing, I can't help but think of how will I feel when it's my mother's turn and what will become of me. It's not happening any time soon but the thought of it is already bringing tears to my eyes...How can I not cry when it really happen? How is it possible to alleviate the sorrow? How will anybody else know the sorrow that one feels when one loses his/her dearest? How can they be consoled? A loss is a loss and life will never be the same again...The thought of death terrifies me, not of my own but of anyone dear to me...I wish I never have to experience such grief.
We went to the wake last night and his wife came over, greeted us and fell into my arms for comfort. We were never this close to be hugging like that! But I think she needed all the comfort she could get from everyone, so I hugged her, sharing her sorrows and my eyes swelled up. Her eyes were swelling up too but my MIL told her not to be so sad, let him go with a peace of mind so that he will have a smooth journey into the ether world. I have heard of advises like these in every wake I have attended and I always think to myself, how can one not be sad and cry when one's dearest pass away? The wake is just 3 to 7 days when all friends and relatives will be coming over to give their condolences. They will sit around, chit-chat, eat, drink and some even play mahjong until late in the night. The family of the deceased as hosts will need to attend to their friends and relatives, participate in prayers and rituals led by the priests throughout the duration of the wake. They are usually being kept busy and probably won't have much time and energy to dwell on the fact that their dearest have passed away and cry over it. However, after all these activities are over and when all their friends and relatives have gone home, what will become of them? Won't the loss be suddenly so obvious and the sadness be even more overwhelming?
Every time I attend a funeral or hear of someone's passing, I can't help but think of how will I feel when it's my mother's turn and what will become of me. It's not happening any time soon but the thought of it is already bringing tears to my eyes...How can I not cry when it really happen? How is it possible to alleviate the sorrow? How will anybody else know the sorrow that one feels when one loses his/her dearest? How can they be consoled? A loss is a loss and life will never be the same again...The thought of death terrifies me, not of my own but of anyone dear to me...I wish I never have to experience such grief.
